we're running out of time

hey, soul sister, i don't want to miss a single thing you do tonight.

I don't remember much, but lately memories have been flooding back to me. The ones that I don't want to remember and that I wished I would never be able to remember. I remember when I broke her heart just to have my heart broken also. I remember offering myself to a boy I thought saw me as being special. I was just another girl, and he was too stoned to care or think of me as being special. I remember the way I wanted so bad for somebody to love me the same weird way that I loved them, and that I became all of these different people to please each different person. It didn't work. That's the part I hate remembering most. I've gone in full circles, and I am back with the person I feel I am going to be with forever but sometimes I also feel like it won't last past the summer. I wish... I wish I could find somebody that was HERE. I want somebody to pick me up from school and take me to some music store or coffee place and hold my hand with their arm overlapping mine, the way it feels most comfortable for me. If they don't live here, then I just wish I had somebody that would fly or drive down to see me every now and then. Maybe not every month, but every couple of months would be nice. Somebody that calls me on the phone and tells me about how things are going. Somebody that makes me feel alive. Because right now, I really feel so dead.